By Laura Havice
Most teenagers know what Mono is—it’s the kissing disease, but what most teens and adults don’t know is how debilitating infectious mononucleosis can be. Mono can sideline your life for weeks or months and leave you feeling extreme fatigue beyond the initial symptoms have passed as well as other more serious complications. Mono can also strike long after your teen years have passed.
As a 28 year-old working adult, I was not expecting to get mono. I've always been a very active person, someone who enjoys packing two minutes of living into ever one minute of life. But in the late summer of 2005 I started to feel different, having fevers at night, sneezing, aching--all the symptoms of a cold that wouldn't go away. It wasn’t severe enough to make me worry; I just thought that traveling, working and school were catching up with me.
This lasted for approximately one month until the symptoms started getting extreme, a sore throat so raw that I could barely swallow water, splitting headaches that even migraine medicine couldn't touch and heavy fevers would soak the sheets at night. I had these symptoms for around two days and headed to the first doctor (on a weekend) for a visit. It was an urgent care office, and I felt I had strep throat again. The doctor advised it wasn't strep but probably a bad cold. She sent me home with a Z-pack for the cold.
By Monday the symptoms were worse and I could barely get out of bed. So I went to my regular physician and she thought that it had to be a severe cold and gave me a shot of steroids. No blood tests were done and no additional options were given. After two more days
I went back to the same doctor and begged for them to give me anything that would help. At this point they did a blood test that showed mono. They advised they couldn't give me anything. I was to just ride it out. The doctor also told me that mono takes six to eight weeks to incubate, which means I probably contracted it at a recent conference I had attended.
Infectious mononucleosis, (also known as the kissing disease, or Pfeiffer's disease, is more commonly known as glandular fever, is a disease seen most commonly in adolescents and young adults. Teens tend to show symptoms of fever, sore throat, muscle soreness, and fatigue but can also be present in small children with white patches on the tonsils or in the back of the throat. Mononucleosis is usually caused by the Epstein-Barr virus and is typically transmitted through blood or saliva ("the kissing disease"), or by sharing a drink, or sharing eating utensils. The disease is so-named because the count of mononuclear leukocytes (white blood cells with a one-lobed nucleus) rises significantly. Although not usually serious, the mono virus stays in your system for life.
I ended up being out of work for two months with the first two weeks being the absolute worst. Once diagnosed correctly, I was in bed for almost two weeks, switching between fevers and chills, so weak I couldn't take a shower and with extreme pain both in my head and body as well as my throat. I've never felt so much pain. It was blinding.
Eventually the symptoms subsided but I was left with a high level of weakness that lasted for months. I couldn't walk down steps without help. Taking a shower was impossible because I couldn't lift my arms that high due to the pain probably due to my swollen lymph glands. I also didn’t have the strength to stand that long. Instead, I would sleep for 18 hours a day and then get tired again simply walking to the bathroom. I had to drop out of school, (I was finishing my BFA degree with a few night classes) and take a medical leave of absence from work and depended on a boyfriend’s daily care just to do the basic things. He did not contract mono, and from what I’ve read about this disease, it’s not as contagious as most people think.
Typical Symptoms of Mono:
• Fever--this varies from mild to severe
• Enlarged and tender lymph nodes--particularly on both sides of the neck and under the arm pits
• Sore throat--White patches on the tonsils and back of the throat, perhaps strep throat that doesn’t get better with antibiotics
• Fatigue (sometimes extreme fatigue)
Other Symptoms of Mono Include:
• Swollen tonsils
• Headache
• Skin rash
• Loss of appetite
• Soft, swollen spleen
• Night Sweats
• Aching muscles
• Jaundice
• Depression
• Weakness
• Dizziness or disorientation
• Dry cough
• Enlarged Prostate/Inflamed genitals
• Puffy or swollen eyes (may occur in the early stages of infection)
Fever and fatigue are the hallmark initial symptoms of infectious mononucleosis and can last from one-two months. Many people exposed to the Epstein-Barr virus do not show symptoms of the disease, but carry the virus and can transmit it to others. Children present milder symptoms, which often goes undiagnosed. Due to the long (four to six week) incubation period, mono is difficult to control or track (epidemiological control). About 6% of people who have had infectious mononucleosis will relapse.
Mononucleosis can cause the rectum to swell, which in rare cases may lead to a leakage of feces. Other complications include hepatitis (inflammation of the liver) causing elevation of serum bilirubin (in approximately 40% of patients), jaundice (approximately 5% of cases), and anemia (a deficiency of red blood cells). In rare cases, death may result from severe hepatitis or splenic rupture.
One of the major concerns of mono is a splenomegaly (enlarged spleen) can occur from infectious mononucleosis, therefore contact sports should be discouraged for four to six weeks after diagnosis. The longer mono symptoms are experienced, the more the infection has weakened the person's immune system and the longer the recovery time will be.
In December, I was able to go back to work but I found that I was highly susceptible to any type of cold. I contracted every cold and flu bug I came in contact with. It was over a year before I began to feel somewhat like my old self. I ended up with weight gain and muscle loss from the lack of exercise, and two years later, this is something I’m currently addressing.
Treatment
Acetaminophen or other non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drugs (NSAIDs) may be used to reduce fever and pain. Aspirin is not recommended due to the risk of Reye's syndrome in children and young adults. Steroids are sometimes used to reduce swelling of the throat or lymph nodes.
Rest is recommended during the acute phase of the infection and contact sports should be avoided to reduce the risk of splenic rupture, for at least one month and can be determined by an ultrasound scan.
Laura Havice lives and writes in Jacksonville, Florida. Her stories have been appeared in many publications including The Osprey, Andwerve, Starry Night Review and Fiction Fix.
Medical facts were gathered from:
www.mayoclinic.com/health/mononucleosis
www.wikipedia.org/wiki/Infectious
Friday, September 7, 2007
I Want a Massage But I Don't Know What to Expect
By Lisa Schmidt, LMT
Erin would like a massage, but she’s shy and doesn’t know what to expect.
her neck and shoulders spasm in pain. As an insurance adjuster, she spends close to eight hours a day on the computer and on the phone. A massage might help, but she doesn’t know what to expect.
Erin represents many people who find massage intimidating. They might be afraid they will have to strip down and be seen by a stranger. They’re afraid they’ll be judged as fat, or wrinkled, or that they don’t know how to talk to or relate to a massage therapist. They’re not sure of standard protocol. Do they talk during a massage? Or remain silent? Should they speak up if the massage if too hard or too light? What if they pass gas? Many of these concerns keep people from enjoying the benefits of massage.
As a licensed massage therapist and educator, I hope to explain in detail a basic massage, its benefits, and offer insight on the many benefits of massage, and how to be more comfortable and get the most out of your massage.
The Benefits of Massage:
• Breaks down metabolic wastes
• Helps circulatory and lymphatic systems
• Helps with muscle aches and pains
• Helps with range of motion in the joints
• Is beneficial after exercise
• Helps reduce stress
• Can help with insomnia
• Massage is often recommended after surgery or for certain conditions such as: thoracic outlet syndrome, sciatica, frozen shoulder, carpel tunnel, chronic headaches/migraines and other medical conditions
• Helps break down scar tissue or allow wounds to heal faster
The Two Most Basic Types of Massage are Swedish and Deep Tissue
Other Modalities Include:
• Hot Stone
• Reiki
• Lomi, Lomi
• Watsu
• Shiatsu
• Acupressure
• Polarity Therapy
• Acupuncture
• Thai Massage
If you’re truly uncomfortable with the idea of someone else touching you, then consider reflexology. Reflexology massages only the feet and hands--calves down and forearms down. This allows you to be at ease with another person touching you.
The Swedish massage is the “feel good” massage and is your most basic. For the purpose of this article, I will be referring to a Swedish massage. A Swedish massage lasts anywhere from 25-50 minutes (as per scheduled) and is for relaxation purposes only—you should not feel overly sore or achy after this massage.
A deep tissue massage does not mean more pressure. It means the massage therapist will be working on deeper muscles, not superficial ones. You should not leave bruised or in pain. Deep tissue massage concentrates on the underlying muscles that may be the cause of your pain or discomfort. With any massage, you may request a specific area and the time spent will be concentrated on your ailment. When making your appointment, you may request male or female.
Your First Massage What You Can Expect:
When you enter the spa, your massage therapist will come to the front, greet you and discuss what your treatment is for the day. You will most likely be offered a beverage. The massage therapist should mention how long the massage will be since they can vary in length. You will then be walked back to the treatment area. The therapist will ask privately if there are any areas you’d like them to concentrate on (pain, soreness). They will also ask if you have any medical conditions or concerns that will relate to this massage. A massage license will be posted in their room. Feel free to ask to view it.
The therapist will share some basic information about your session and ask if you prefer to start face up or face down. You will be instructed to lie between the sheets and demonstrate how to do this. Therapist will explain how to disrobe and ask about your comfort level—if you’d prefer to leave on your undergarments or socks on, etc. Do what you feel comfortable with—every client is different. A massage therapist can massage over clothing, but realize it might not be as relaxing and rejuvenating since your muscles cannot be manipulated as well. You do not need to feel embarrassed about what level of disrobing you choose. This is your massage and your preference, you will not be judged. A good massage therapist is there to help you feel comfortable and safe. You will be asked to remove any jewelry you don’t want lotion to penetrate. You may be asked if you want your gluts, feet, abdomen or face to be massaged. Realize that this will take time away from other areas.
Beginning the Massage:
The massage therapist will leave the room to wash their hands and will not reenter without permission, so feel free to take your time to disrobe. You will then undress and slide between the sheets. Don’t worry about being on the table properly; the therapist will readjust the headpiece (sometimes referred to as the face cradle) and sheets. The therapist will reenter the room by knocking and asking if it’s okay to enter. They will ask you if you’re comfortable, adjust you if needed, ask if the temperature is comfortable and then ask if you’re ready to receive your massage—which is the appropriate way to ask permission to touch you.
To begin your massage, you will be lying on the table either face up or face down, (face down for this discussion) completely draped with a sheet and blanket. The therapist will start with a “still touch,” meaning they will place their hands on your back, not massaging as of yet, just for you to become comfortable with their touch and not feel startled or invaded. Your back will be undraped down to your hips. If you leave your underwear on, the therapist may tuck the sheet under the top of your waistband, or they will place their hand on your lower back/upper buttocks to fold the sheet back to its proper place. Your gluteal “cleavage” should not show. Therapist will then proceed with the massage on your back, shoulders and neck and may ask you if you are satisfied with the pressure of the massage. Speak up soon so that you can enjoy the rest of the massage. Don’t suffer—a good therapist will not be insulted. You can ask the therapist to readjust the pressure at anytime time during the massage; you might want to request more pressure on a certain area, such as your back.
After your neck, shoulders, and back have been massage, the therapist will then proceed to your gluts, if this is what you requested. If you have agreed to receive gluteal work, your “cheek” would be undraped up to the gluteal cleavage but not revealing the cleavage. Only one “cheek” will be worked on at a time so that the cleavage is never exposed. The therapist can also work on the outside of the sheets, but it’s not as effective. After the gluts, or if the gluts were skipped, the therapist will then proceed to the thighs. During inner thigh work, the massage therapist’s fingertips should never move toward your groin, always away. If the therapist observes signs of shyness or that you are uncomfortable, they will respect you and work further down the thigh or area in question. The calves and the feet will be massaged as well, and the massage will follow a circular pattern, working from the shoulders and back, down one leg to the next, then your arms, neck and head.
There are many draping methods used to ask a client to turn over, but rest assured you will stay covered under the sheet. Most massage therapists will lean against the table with their legs so that they’re anchoring the sheet, and then reach across you to hold up the sheet and look away as you turn over. Another alternative is to once again anchor the sheet in place with their legs, lean against the table and hold the top of the sheet near your upper back as you turn over. The therapist will be standing behind the sheet so it will act as a curtain.
The therapist will ask you to move down so that your head is on the table, not in the face cradle. They will start with the last leg they worked on when you were face down. They will work up and undrape in a similar manor as described above.
The abdominal area will be massaged only if requested. When massaging the abdomen, if the client is a female, your breasts will be draped with a pillow case or sheet at all times. The top of the sheet will be draped to the top of your hips. An abdomen massage is usually reserved for those who specifically request this to relieve the ailment of constipation. It’s highly effective and should work immediately, so consider this when requesting abdominal work.
The massage therapist should not go above your rib cage and will work about two inches below your clavicle (collar bone) so your breasts will not be touched during a massage. The order of a frontal massage is: feet, legs, abdomen, (if requested) arms, shoulders and working toward the head. If you are concerned that your breasts might be exposed as your arm is being removed from the sheet, know that a skilled therapist can do this easily and modestly.
Neck and shoulders are typically massaged last. The therapist will then sit on a stool at the head of the table to work on your neck and head. They will work on your face and your hair (if requested). Some people might not want lotion or in their face or hair. Hair and head massage is very relaxing and soothing, so consider cancelling any plans afterward to enjoy this treat. Most spas and even day spas offer complimentary showers and hair products, so feel free to take advantage of this and schedule your time appropriately.
Finishing the Massage:
Just as the massage began, the massage therapist will end your massage in a “still position” resting their hand lightly on either your shoulder or head. The therapist will indicate your massage is complete and may gently rock your shoulders. The therapist may ask that you take a minute to gather yourself before you get off the table and dress since some people might be dizzy. The therapist will then leave the room and wait for you outside. Be aware that the therapist only has five to ten minutes to prepare for their next client. As tempting as it is to take a nap, therapists are often scheduled for consecutive massage treatments. Leave the sheets on the table. You don’t need to straighten the room.
Tipping can be left on the counter, or after you dress you can hand it directly to the therapist or leave it at the front desk. Most major spas do not encourage their employees receive tips —so if you feel compelled to leave a tip—which is greatly appreciated, you may need to offer it three or four times, or simply leave it on the massage table or on the counter. Gratuity is added into your service charge, but that percentage does not go directly to your massage therapist and is divided among everyone you have seen at the spa—from the receptionist, to the locker room attendant. Since massage therapists give both physically and emotionally to their clients, you may feel close to them and want to hug them, or offer an additional tip. This is perfectly acceptable. Most people enjoy building a rapport with their massage therapist and request them again and again
It’s perfectly normal for your massage to affect your emotions. Most people in the United States are either touched sexually or casually, and since we are not an affectionate nation, having someone touch us is an unusual act and affects each person differently. Massage therapists understand this reaction.
Embarrassing Moments:
• Passing Gas
• Burping
• Excessive Talking
• Erections
Most massage therapists are not going to say anything about a client passing gas, but appreciate an “excuse me.” Their training gives them the understanding that they are affecting the digestive and circulatory system. They expect these occurrences to happen.
Burping is a similar bodily response. Be courteous and say “excuse me.”
A good therapist should not talk unless spoken to. Massage is supposed to be relaxing, so don’t feel obligated to entertain the massage therapist. Some people experience the need to talk excessively out of nervousness. That’s fine, but don’t be offended if your therapist doesn’t seem chatty. They’ve been trained to be quiet and calm for your benefit. If talking makes you comfortable, the therapist will pick up on this and converse with you accordingly. For stomach gurgling or growling, the therapists may offer you something to eat if you indicate a need. There are snacks available, so feel free to ask.
An erection is a physiological response and blood is being pushed into the core of your body. Massage therapists realize and understand that this may not be a sexual response. Unless you take further action a good therapist will not give this any attention and continue to work professionally. If you appear uncomfortable, the therapist may offer a heavy blanket to anchor the sheet or ask if you’d like to turn over.
After the Massage:
Drink lots of water after a massage to help wash out toxins. You may feel a little tender depending on your physical condition and pressure you requested during your massage, or the condition of your muscles. Take Ibuprophen if you feel a need. Soaking in Epsom’s salt is helpful as well. The first massage is the most uncomfortable, so find the most reputable establishment near you—even if you have to pay a little more.
Spas can be found at www.Spafinder.com or www.massagetherapistfinder.com.
Other helpful websites are:
www.massagenetwork.com
www.nationwidemassage.com
www.amtamassage.org/ (American Massage Therapy Organization
www.ncbtmb.com (National Certification Board for Therapeutic and Bodywork
Lisa Christine Schmidt is a LMT working in the state of Florida, MA # 35255.
She has been licensed for six years and has worked at some of top spas in the US including Ritz Carlton, SawGrass Marriott, and Amelia Island Plantation.
She currently enjoys teaches massage therapy at FCCJ Community College and Sanford Brown College.
Erin would like a massage, but she’s shy and doesn’t know what to expect.
her neck and shoulders spasm in pain. As an insurance adjuster, she spends close to eight hours a day on the computer and on the phone. A massage might help, but she doesn’t know what to expect.
Erin represents many people who find massage intimidating. They might be afraid they will have to strip down and be seen by a stranger. They’re afraid they’ll be judged as fat, or wrinkled, or that they don’t know how to talk to or relate to a massage therapist. They’re not sure of standard protocol. Do they talk during a massage? Or remain silent? Should they speak up if the massage if too hard or too light? What if they pass gas? Many of these concerns keep people from enjoying the benefits of massage.
As a licensed massage therapist and educator, I hope to explain in detail a basic massage, its benefits, and offer insight on the many benefits of massage, and how to be more comfortable and get the most out of your massage.
The Benefits of Massage:
• Breaks down metabolic wastes
• Helps circulatory and lymphatic systems
• Helps with muscle aches and pains
• Helps with range of motion in the joints
• Is beneficial after exercise
• Helps reduce stress
• Can help with insomnia
• Massage is often recommended after surgery or for certain conditions such as: thoracic outlet syndrome, sciatica, frozen shoulder, carpel tunnel, chronic headaches/migraines and other medical conditions
• Helps break down scar tissue or allow wounds to heal faster
The Two Most Basic Types of Massage are Swedish and Deep Tissue
Other Modalities Include:
• Hot Stone
• Reiki
• Lomi, Lomi
• Watsu
• Shiatsu
• Acupressure
• Polarity Therapy
• Acupuncture
• Thai Massage
If you’re truly uncomfortable with the idea of someone else touching you, then consider reflexology. Reflexology massages only the feet and hands--calves down and forearms down. This allows you to be at ease with another person touching you.
The Swedish massage is the “feel good” massage and is your most basic. For the purpose of this article, I will be referring to a Swedish massage. A Swedish massage lasts anywhere from 25-50 minutes (as per scheduled) and is for relaxation purposes only—you should not feel overly sore or achy after this massage.
A deep tissue massage does not mean more pressure. It means the massage therapist will be working on deeper muscles, not superficial ones. You should not leave bruised or in pain. Deep tissue massage concentrates on the underlying muscles that may be the cause of your pain or discomfort. With any massage, you may request a specific area and the time spent will be concentrated on your ailment. When making your appointment, you may request male or female.
Your First Massage What You Can Expect:
When you enter the spa, your massage therapist will come to the front, greet you and discuss what your treatment is for the day. You will most likely be offered a beverage. The massage therapist should mention how long the massage will be since they can vary in length. You will then be walked back to the treatment area. The therapist will ask privately if there are any areas you’d like them to concentrate on (pain, soreness). They will also ask if you have any medical conditions or concerns that will relate to this massage. A massage license will be posted in their room. Feel free to ask to view it.
The therapist will share some basic information about your session and ask if you prefer to start face up or face down. You will be instructed to lie between the sheets and demonstrate how to do this. Therapist will explain how to disrobe and ask about your comfort level—if you’d prefer to leave on your undergarments or socks on, etc. Do what you feel comfortable with—every client is different. A massage therapist can massage over clothing, but realize it might not be as relaxing and rejuvenating since your muscles cannot be manipulated as well. You do not need to feel embarrassed about what level of disrobing you choose. This is your massage and your preference, you will not be judged. A good massage therapist is there to help you feel comfortable and safe. You will be asked to remove any jewelry you don’t want lotion to penetrate. You may be asked if you want your gluts, feet, abdomen or face to be massaged. Realize that this will take time away from other areas.
Beginning the Massage:
The massage therapist will leave the room to wash their hands and will not reenter without permission, so feel free to take your time to disrobe. You will then undress and slide between the sheets. Don’t worry about being on the table properly; the therapist will readjust the headpiece (sometimes referred to as the face cradle) and sheets. The therapist will reenter the room by knocking and asking if it’s okay to enter. They will ask you if you’re comfortable, adjust you if needed, ask if the temperature is comfortable and then ask if you’re ready to receive your massage—which is the appropriate way to ask permission to touch you.
To begin your massage, you will be lying on the table either face up or face down, (face down for this discussion) completely draped with a sheet and blanket. The therapist will start with a “still touch,” meaning they will place their hands on your back, not massaging as of yet, just for you to become comfortable with their touch and not feel startled or invaded. Your back will be undraped down to your hips. If you leave your underwear on, the therapist may tuck the sheet under the top of your waistband, or they will place their hand on your lower back/upper buttocks to fold the sheet back to its proper place. Your gluteal “cleavage” should not show. Therapist will then proceed with the massage on your back, shoulders and neck and may ask you if you are satisfied with the pressure of the massage. Speak up soon so that you can enjoy the rest of the massage. Don’t suffer—a good therapist will not be insulted. You can ask the therapist to readjust the pressure at anytime time during the massage; you might want to request more pressure on a certain area, such as your back.
After your neck, shoulders, and back have been massage, the therapist will then proceed to your gluts, if this is what you requested. If you have agreed to receive gluteal work, your “cheek” would be undraped up to the gluteal cleavage but not revealing the cleavage. Only one “cheek” will be worked on at a time so that the cleavage is never exposed. The therapist can also work on the outside of the sheets, but it’s not as effective. After the gluts, or if the gluts were skipped, the therapist will then proceed to the thighs. During inner thigh work, the massage therapist’s fingertips should never move toward your groin, always away. If the therapist observes signs of shyness or that you are uncomfortable, they will respect you and work further down the thigh or area in question. The calves and the feet will be massaged as well, and the massage will follow a circular pattern, working from the shoulders and back, down one leg to the next, then your arms, neck and head.
There are many draping methods used to ask a client to turn over, but rest assured you will stay covered under the sheet. Most massage therapists will lean against the table with their legs so that they’re anchoring the sheet, and then reach across you to hold up the sheet and look away as you turn over. Another alternative is to once again anchor the sheet in place with their legs, lean against the table and hold the top of the sheet near your upper back as you turn over. The therapist will be standing behind the sheet so it will act as a curtain.
The therapist will ask you to move down so that your head is on the table, not in the face cradle. They will start with the last leg they worked on when you were face down. They will work up and undrape in a similar manor as described above.
The abdominal area will be massaged only if requested. When massaging the abdomen, if the client is a female, your breasts will be draped with a pillow case or sheet at all times. The top of the sheet will be draped to the top of your hips. An abdomen massage is usually reserved for those who specifically request this to relieve the ailment of constipation. It’s highly effective and should work immediately, so consider this when requesting abdominal work.
The massage therapist should not go above your rib cage and will work about two inches below your clavicle (collar bone) so your breasts will not be touched during a massage. The order of a frontal massage is: feet, legs, abdomen, (if requested) arms, shoulders and working toward the head. If you are concerned that your breasts might be exposed as your arm is being removed from the sheet, know that a skilled therapist can do this easily and modestly.
Neck and shoulders are typically massaged last. The therapist will then sit on a stool at the head of the table to work on your neck and head. They will work on your face and your hair (if requested). Some people might not want lotion or in their face or hair. Hair and head massage is very relaxing and soothing, so consider cancelling any plans afterward to enjoy this treat. Most spas and even day spas offer complimentary showers and hair products, so feel free to take advantage of this and schedule your time appropriately.
Finishing the Massage:
Just as the massage began, the massage therapist will end your massage in a “still position” resting their hand lightly on either your shoulder or head. The therapist will indicate your massage is complete and may gently rock your shoulders. The therapist may ask that you take a minute to gather yourself before you get off the table and dress since some people might be dizzy. The therapist will then leave the room and wait for you outside. Be aware that the therapist only has five to ten minutes to prepare for their next client. As tempting as it is to take a nap, therapists are often scheduled for consecutive massage treatments. Leave the sheets on the table. You don’t need to straighten the room.
Tipping can be left on the counter, or after you dress you can hand it directly to the therapist or leave it at the front desk. Most major spas do not encourage their employees receive tips —so if you feel compelled to leave a tip—which is greatly appreciated, you may need to offer it three or four times, or simply leave it on the massage table or on the counter. Gratuity is added into your service charge, but that percentage does not go directly to your massage therapist and is divided among everyone you have seen at the spa—from the receptionist, to the locker room attendant. Since massage therapists give both physically and emotionally to their clients, you may feel close to them and want to hug them, or offer an additional tip. This is perfectly acceptable. Most people enjoy building a rapport with their massage therapist and request them again and again
It’s perfectly normal for your massage to affect your emotions. Most people in the United States are either touched sexually or casually, and since we are not an affectionate nation, having someone touch us is an unusual act and affects each person differently. Massage therapists understand this reaction.
Embarrassing Moments:
• Passing Gas
• Burping
• Excessive Talking
• Erections
Most massage therapists are not going to say anything about a client passing gas, but appreciate an “excuse me.” Their training gives them the understanding that they are affecting the digestive and circulatory system. They expect these occurrences to happen.
Burping is a similar bodily response. Be courteous and say “excuse me.”
A good therapist should not talk unless spoken to. Massage is supposed to be relaxing, so don’t feel obligated to entertain the massage therapist. Some people experience the need to talk excessively out of nervousness. That’s fine, but don’t be offended if your therapist doesn’t seem chatty. They’ve been trained to be quiet and calm for your benefit. If talking makes you comfortable, the therapist will pick up on this and converse with you accordingly. For stomach gurgling or growling, the therapists may offer you something to eat if you indicate a need. There are snacks available, so feel free to ask.
An erection is a physiological response and blood is being pushed into the core of your body. Massage therapists realize and understand that this may not be a sexual response. Unless you take further action a good therapist will not give this any attention and continue to work professionally. If you appear uncomfortable, the therapist may offer a heavy blanket to anchor the sheet or ask if you’d like to turn over.
After the Massage:
Drink lots of water after a massage to help wash out toxins. You may feel a little tender depending on your physical condition and pressure you requested during your massage, or the condition of your muscles. Take Ibuprophen if you feel a need. Soaking in Epsom’s salt is helpful as well. The first massage is the most uncomfortable, so find the most reputable establishment near you—even if you have to pay a little more.
Spas can be found at www.Spafinder.com or www.massagetherapistfinder.com.
Other helpful websites are:
www.massagenetwork.com
www.nationwidemassage.com
www.amtamassage.org/ (American Massage Therapy Organization
www.ncbtmb.com (National Certification Board for Therapeutic and Bodywork
Lisa Christine Schmidt is a LMT working in the state of Florida, MA # 35255.
She has been licensed for six years and has worked at some of top spas in the US including Ritz Carlton, SawGrass Marriott, and Amelia Island Plantation.
She currently enjoys teaches massage therapy at FCCJ Community College and Sanford Brown College.
Saturday, August 4, 2007
I Can’t Breathe! Understanding Pulmonary Hypertension: PPH, PAH or IPAH
By Cheryl Kaye Tardif
What is Pulmonary Hypertension?
Pulmonary hypertension is a rare, serious and incurable lung disorder that affects how blood flows from the lungs to the heart. It is categorized in two ways: primary, meaning there is no obvious cause; and secondary, in which a cause is known, such as bronchitis or emphysema. Primary pulmonary hypertension (PPH), also referred to as pulmonary arterial hypertension (PAH) and more recently, idiopathic pulmonary arterial hypertension (IPAH), causes increased blood pressure in the pulmonary artery, a blood vessel that carries oxygen-poor blood from the right ventricle of the heart to the lungs.
Increased blood pressure can have serious results. The muscles within the walls of the arteries may tighten, causing the arteries to constrict. The walls of the pulmonary arteries may thicken. Scar tissue may form, causing the arteries to become increasingly narrow. Tiny blood clots may form within the smaller arteries, causing blockages. In more serious cases, when the right ventricle no longer functions properly, progressive heart failure occurs, leading most often to death.
Symptoms:
Symptoms of PPH frequently occur over a period of time, making the condition difficult to diagnose. Although most of the symptoms relate to breathing issues, such as shortness of breath and hyperventilation, other symptoms may include:
• Extreme fatigue
• Dizziness or fainting
• Weakness of the body
• Racing pulse
• Chest pain
• Swelling of legs and hands
• Coughing up blood
• Bluish discoloration of lips and skin (cyanosis)
Diagnosing PPH:
PPH is regularly misdiagnosed in routine medical examinations since its symptoms can be confused with other more common conditions. These conditions must be ruled out first, along with secondary pulmonary hypertension disorders. Unfortunately this means that PPH is usually diagnosed after the appearance of many of the symptoms, and by that time the disorder is likely to have progressed to a more serious stage.
Tests to diagnose PPH include:
• X-ray of the chest
• Electrocardiogram
• Echocardiogram
• Cardiac catheterization
• Blood tests
• MRI
• Pulmonary function tests
• Connective tissue serology
• Perfusion lung scans
In most cases, the cause of primary pulmonary hypertension is unknown, yet could be attributed to genetic or familial predisposition, immune system disease or drug/chemical exposure. A number of drugs, such as cocaine, amphetamines and the diet drug Fen Phen (taken off the market in September 1997) have been linked to causing PPH.
Treatment:
PPH requires proper medical diagnosis, treatment and follow-up. Most treatment regimes require drugs that help lower blood pressure, or affect the blood, blood vessels, lungs and/or heart. In recent studies, Viagra (Sildenafil) has been found to improve the condition of PPH. It is awaiting approval for use as a treatment for PPH.
Other drug therapies may include:
• Anticoagulants
• Calcium channel blockers
• Diuretics
• Endothelin receptor antagonists
• Prostacyclin analogues
Since every patient responds differently to drug combinations, amounts and types of drugs must be carefully monitored and often changed. For patients who do not respond to drug therapy, the other alternatives are heart-lung or lung transplantation. However, transplantation can lead to complications that could result in death.
Statistics:
The Montefiore Medical Center states that the first recorded case of primary pulmonary hypertension occurred in 1891. Each year in the United States, an estimated 500 to 1,000 new cases are diagnosed, most of them women between the ages of 20 and 40. However, both genders and any age can develop PPH. According to the American Lung Association, there were 3,065 deaths attributed to PPH in 2000. It can also be a genetic disorder―familial primary pulmonary hypertension―passed on by a parent. If a parent is known to have PPH, genetic counseling is recommended. According to Ronald J Oudiz, MD, “IPAH is responsible for approximately 125-150 deaths per year”.
Life expectancy:
Before 1990, the diagnosis of PPH was virtually a death sentence, with little hope of prolonging life. Since then, with the advances in new treatments and drug therapies, patients with PPH may have an increased life expectancy. Untreated, the survival rate is about 68% at one year, 48% at three years, and 34 % at five years, according to the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill Pulmonary & Critical Care Medicine. With treatment, life expectancy can increase on average 3-5 years.
Follow-Up Treatments:
As with any disease, a diagnosis of pulmonary hypertension requires counseling for all involved―the patient and family. Having all the facts and knowing what treatment options are available and what lifestyle changes to make are vital to the continued health of the patient. For more information, please visit the National Heart Lung and Blood Institute or any of the other resources for heart and lung care.
Cheryl Kaye Tardif has worked in the past as a journalist and book editor. Currently, she is the author of three novels: The River, Divine Intervention and the bestselling novel Whale Song, a novel that includes a character with PPH. Cheryl spent over a month researching PPH and this article is the result of her findings. Besides PPH, Whale Song deals with many controversial and emotional issues, including the assisted death of a loved one.
For more information on Cheryl and Whale Song, please visit http://www.whalesongbook.com.
What is Pulmonary Hypertension?
Pulmonary hypertension is a rare, serious and incurable lung disorder that affects how blood flows from the lungs to the heart. It is categorized in two ways: primary, meaning there is no obvious cause; and secondary, in which a cause is known, such as bronchitis or emphysema. Primary pulmonary hypertension (PPH), also referred to as pulmonary arterial hypertension (PAH) and more recently, idiopathic pulmonary arterial hypertension (IPAH), causes increased blood pressure in the pulmonary artery, a blood vessel that carries oxygen-poor blood from the right ventricle of the heart to the lungs.
Increased blood pressure can have serious results. The muscles within the walls of the arteries may tighten, causing the arteries to constrict. The walls of the pulmonary arteries may thicken. Scar tissue may form, causing the arteries to become increasingly narrow. Tiny blood clots may form within the smaller arteries, causing blockages. In more serious cases, when the right ventricle no longer functions properly, progressive heart failure occurs, leading most often to death.
Symptoms:
Symptoms of PPH frequently occur over a period of time, making the condition difficult to diagnose. Although most of the symptoms relate to breathing issues, such as shortness of breath and hyperventilation, other symptoms may include:
• Extreme fatigue
• Dizziness or fainting
• Weakness of the body
• Racing pulse
• Chest pain
• Swelling of legs and hands
• Coughing up blood
• Bluish discoloration of lips and skin (cyanosis)
Diagnosing PPH:
PPH is regularly misdiagnosed in routine medical examinations since its symptoms can be confused with other more common conditions. These conditions must be ruled out first, along with secondary pulmonary hypertension disorders. Unfortunately this means that PPH is usually diagnosed after the appearance of many of the symptoms, and by that time the disorder is likely to have progressed to a more serious stage.
Tests to diagnose PPH include:
• X-ray of the chest
• Electrocardiogram
• Echocardiogram
• Cardiac catheterization
• Blood tests
• MRI
• Pulmonary function tests
• Connective tissue serology
• Perfusion lung scans
In most cases, the cause of primary pulmonary hypertension is unknown, yet could be attributed to genetic or familial predisposition, immune system disease or drug/chemical exposure. A number of drugs, such as cocaine, amphetamines and the diet drug Fen Phen (taken off the market in September 1997) have been linked to causing PPH.
Treatment:
PPH requires proper medical diagnosis, treatment and follow-up. Most treatment regimes require drugs that help lower blood pressure, or affect the blood, blood vessels, lungs and/or heart. In recent studies, Viagra (Sildenafil) has been found to improve the condition of PPH. It is awaiting approval for use as a treatment for PPH.
Other drug therapies may include:
• Anticoagulants
• Calcium channel blockers
• Diuretics
• Endothelin receptor antagonists
• Prostacyclin analogues
Since every patient responds differently to drug combinations, amounts and types of drugs must be carefully monitored and often changed. For patients who do not respond to drug therapy, the other alternatives are heart-lung or lung transplantation. However, transplantation can lead to complications that could result in death.
Statistics:
The Montefiore Medical Center states that the first recorded case of primary pulmonary hypertension occurred in 1891. Each year in the United States, an estimated 500 to 1,000 new cases are diagnosed, most of them women between the ages of 20 and 40. However, both genders and any age can develop PPH. According to the American Lung Association, there were 3,065 deaths attributed to PPH in 2000. It can also be a genetic disorder―familial primary pulmonary hypertension―passed on by a parent. If a parent is known to have PPH, genetic counseling is recommended. According to Ronald J Oudiz, MD, “IPAH is responsible for approximately 125-150 deaths per year”.
Life expectancy:
Before 1990, the diagnosis of PPH was virtually a death sentence, with little hope of prolonging life. Since then, with the advances in new treatments and drug therapies, patients with PPH may have an increased life expectancy. Untreated, the survival rate is about 68% at one year, 48% at three years, and 34 % at five years, according to the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill Pulmonary & Critical Care Medicine. With treatment, life expectancy can increase on average 3-5 years.
Follow-Up Treatments:
As with any disease, a diagnosis of pulmonary hypertension requires counseling for all involved―the patient and family. Having all the facts and knowing what treatment options are available and what lifestyle changes to make are vital to the continued health of the patient. For more information, please visit the National Heart Lung and Blood Institute or any of the other resources for heart and lung care.
Cheryl Kaye Tardif has worked in the past as a journalist and book editor. Currently, she is the author of three novels: The River, Divine Intervention and the bestselling novel Whale Song, a novel that includes a character with PPH. Cheryl spent over a month researching PPH and this article is the result of her findings. Besides PPH, Whale Song deals with many controversial and emotional issues, including the assisted death of a loved one.
For more information on Cheryl and Whale Song, please visit http://www.whalesongbook.com.
Friday, August 3, 2007
Early Onset Alzheimers: A Family In Crisis
By Carol D. O’Dell
At first, Irene* kept forgetting her cat Waldo’s name. She didn’t think too much about it, chalked it up to menopause. Then she forgot how to get home from the grocery store and drove around for nearly three hours before a policeman stopped her—for driving too slow. She didn’t mention the incident to either of her two daughters until something about the police ride home and the tow truck accidentally slipped out in conversation.
Irene visited her family physician who referred her to a neurologist. She was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer’s disease at the age of 52. Her family was devastated. At first, neither she nor her two daughters talked about it. She was given Aricept, a common Alzheimer’s drug and took her daily dose even though she said she felt dizzy and complained of nausea. She seemed more clear-headed and her daughters welcomed the slight improvement. They made plans to change their mother’s living arrangements since neither of them lived nearby. They worried about her cooking meals or attempting household chores. Both daughters agreed to care for mom six months out of the year.
Divorced, Irene then began taking turns living with her two daughters—one on the east coast, the other the west. Adjusting to not being the woman of the house wasn’t easy. Depression loomed. Each daughter found an adult day care for when mom stayed with them—to give her something to do during the day. Her daughters continued to work and share the responsibility of “mom.” They felt their mom was too young to enter a full-time care facility, and they wanted to make the most of time they had—taking vacations, and finishing scrapbooks and just being together every chance they could. They got “the button” as Irene called it, in case she fell or needed immediate care. They learned all they could about home care for Alzheimer’s.
Home Treatment in Early Stages from OurAlzheimer’s.com at www.healthcentral.com
Telling the Patient. Often doctors will not tell patients that they have Alzheimer's. This is a family decision. If a patient expresses a need to know the truth, it should be disclosed. Both the caregiver and the patient can then begin to address issues that can be controlled, such as access to support groups and drug research.
Mood and Emotional Behavior. Patients display abrupt mood swings and many become aggressive and angry. Some of this erratic behavior is caused by chemical changes in the brain. But it may also be due to the experience of losing knowledge and understanding of one's surroundings, causing fear and frustration that patients can no longer express verbally.
The following recommendations for caregivers may help soothe patients and avoid agitation:
• Keep environmental distractions and noise at a minimum if possible. (Even normal noises, such as people talking outside a room, may seem threatening and trigger agitation or aggression.)
• Speak clearly. Most experts recommend speaking slowly to a patient with Alzheimer's disease, but some caregivers report that patients respond better to clear, quickly spoken, short sentences that they can more easily remember.
• Use a combination of facial expression, voice tones, and words for communicating emotions. (One study suggested that patients may have difficulty in recognizing the meaning of facial expressions, particularly those signaling sadness, surprise, and disgust.)
• Limit choices (such as clothing selection).
• Offer diversions, such as a snack or car ride, if the patient starts shouting or exhibiting other disruptive behavior.
• Simply touching and talking may also help.
• Maintain as natural an attitude as possible. Patients with Alzheimer's disease can be highly sensitive to the caregiver's underlying emotions and react negatively to patronization or signals of anger and frustration.
• Showing movies or videos of family members and events from the patient's past may be comforting.
Irene enjoyed adult day-care for a time but as she began to wander, her daughters had to hire home health care. It was difficult to find a good match. Irene grew combative. Each daughter worried not only mom’s quality of care, but of the rising cost as well. Irene did not have long term health care insurance.
Irene is now 62 and in a memory loss unit. Her dementia is advancing quickly.
Her medication has been changed. She’s now taking Nameda.
Irene’s west coast daughter decided to move to the east coast to oversee her mother’s care. She is now divorced and lives with her sister. She has two children, ages 5 and 9. She no longer takes the grandchildren to see their grandmother, hoping they’ll remember the good times. Irene is angry and belligerent some days, and others, she seems to have adjusted. The two daughters are grateful they have each other—for shared responsibility and emotional support.
Common Alzheimer’s Medications:
The first four drugs belong to a group of drugs called Cholinesterase Inhibitors. They delay the break down of acetylcholine in the brain. Acetylcholine helps communication between the nerve cells and is important for memory.
Aricept, Exelon and Razadyne are most effective in the early stages of Alzheimer’s disease. This group of prescription drugs has been shown to have some modest effect in slowing the degeneration of cognitive symptoms. The drugs can also reduce the behavioral problems that are exhibited in people with Alzheimer’s. When the drugs work well they can significantly improve people’s quality of life. Benefits, if they occur, should happen within a few weeks.
Namenda (memantine)
Nameda is a N-methylD-aspartate (MNDA) antagonist It acts on another neurotransmitter (transmitter of nerve messages) called glutamate. The drug shields the brain from glutamate which contributes to the death of brain cells in people with Alzheimer’s disease.
Effective in moderate to severe forms of Alzheimer’s disease, improving the day to day life of the person with Alzheimer’s disease, and by implication the life of the care givers. Improvements should be seen within a few weeks.
Alzheimer’s Medication information is from www.aboutAlzheimer’s.com
It’s been ten years since Irene’s original diagnosis of early onset Alzheimer’s disease. Irene doesn’t recognize her daughters anymore, but they check on her every day either by phone call or visit. She’s losing her ability to speak, which is sometimes just gibberish. She’s still mobile and is often restless and agitated. She walks aimlessly in the halls, common Alzheimer’s occurrence. Both sisters attend a caregiver’s support group to cope with their guilt, stress, and sorrow. They worry. Is early onset Alzheimer’s genetic? We’ll discuss this issue in a follow-up article.
Sidebar:
WARNING SIGNS OF ALZHEIMER'S
Memory loss
Difficulty performing familiar tasks
Problems with language
Disorientation to time and place
Poor or decreased judgment
Problems with abstract thinking
Misplacing things
Changes in mood or behavior
Changes in personality
Loss of initiative
*Irene is a fictitious name, but this story is based on a real family’s struggle with Alzheimer’s.
At first, Irene* kept forgetting her cat Waldo’s name. She didn’t think too much about it, chalked it up to menopause. Then she forgot how to get home from the grocery store and drove around for nearly three hours before a policeman stopped her—for driving too slow. She didn’t mention the incident to either of her two daughters until something about the police ride home and the tow truck accidentally slipped out in conversation.
Irene visited her family physician who referred her to a neurologist. She was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer’s disease at the age of 52. Her family was devastated. At first, neither she nor her two daughters talked about it. She was given Aricept, a common Alzheimer’s drug and took her daily dose even though she said she felt dizzy and complained of nausea. She seemed more clear-headed and her daughters welcomed the slight improvement. They made plans to change their mother’s living arrangements since neither of them lived nearby. They worried about her cooking meals or attempting household chores. Both daughters agreed to care for mom six months out of the year.
Divorced, Irene then began taking turns living with her two daughters—one on the east coast, the other the west. Adjusting to not being the woman of the house wasn’t easy. Depression loomed. Each daughter found an adult day care for when mom stayed with them—to give her something to do during the day. Her daughters continued to work and share the responsibility of “mom.” They felt their mom was too young to enter a full-time care facility, and they wanted to make the most of time they had—taking vacations, and finishing scrapbooks and just being together every chance they could. They got “the button” as Irene called it, in case she fell or needed immediate care. They learned all they could about home care for Alzheimer’s.
Home Treatment in Early Stages from OurAlzheimer’s.com at www.healthcentral.com
Telling the Patient. Often doctors will not tell patients that they have Alzheimer's. This is a family decision. If a patient expresses a need to know the truth, it should be disclosed. Both the caregiver and the patient can then begin to address issues that can be controlled, such as access to support groups and drug research.
Mood and Emotional Behavior. Patients display abrupt mood swings and many become aggressive and angry. Some of this erratic behavior is caused by chemical changes in the brain. But it may also be due to the experience of losing knowledge and understanding of one's surroundings, causing fear and frustration that patients can no longer express verbally.
The following recommendations for caregivers may help soothe patients and avoid agitation:
• Keep environmental distractions and noise at a minimum if possible. (Even normal noises, such as people talking outside a room, may seem threatening and trigger agitation or aggression.)
• Speak clearly. Most experts recommend speaking slowly to a patient with Alzheimer's disease, but some caregivers report that patients respond better to clear, quickly spoken, short sentences that they can more easily remember.
• Use a combination of facial expression, voice tones, and words for communicating emotions. (One study suggested that patients may have difficulty in recognizing the meaning of facial expressions, particularly those signaling sadness, surprise, and disgust.)
• Limit choices (such as clothing selection).
• Offer diversions, such as a snack or car ride, if the patient starts shouting or exhibiting other disruptive behavior.
• Simply touching and talking may also help.
• Maintain as natural an attitude as possible. Patients with Alzheimer's disease can be highly sensitive to the caregiver's underlying emotions and react negatively to patronization or signals of anger and frustration.
• Showing movies or videos of family members and events from the patient's past may be comforting.
Irene enjoyed adult day-care for a time but as she began to wander, her daughters had to hire home health care. It was difficult to find a good match. Irene grew combative. Each daughter worried not only mom’s quality of care, but of the rising cost as well. Irene did not have long term health care insurance.
Irene is now 62 and in a memory loss unit. Her dementia is advancing quickly.
Her medication has been changed. She’s now taking Nameda.
Irene’s west coast daughter decided to move to the east coast to oversee her mother’s care. She is now divorced and lives with her sister. She has two children, ages 5 and 9. She no longer takes the grandchildren to see their grandmother, hoping they’ll remember the good times. Irene is angry and belligerent some days, and others, she seems to have adjusted. The two daughters are grateful they have each other—for shared responsibility and emotional support.
Common Alzheimer’s Medications:
The first four drugs belong to a group of drugs called Cholinesterase Inhibitors. They delay the break down of acetylcholine in the brain. Acetylcholine helps communication between the nerve cells and is important for memory.
Aricept, Exelon and Razadyne are most effective in the early stages of Alzheimer’s disease. This group of prescription drugs has been shown to have some modest effect in slowing the degeneration of cognitive symptoms. The drugs can also reduce the behavioral problems that are exhibited in people with Alzheimer’s. When the drugs work well they can significantly improve people’s quality of life. Benefits, if they occur, should happen within a few weeks.
Namenda (memantine)
Nameda is a N-methylD-aspartate (MNDA) antagonist It acts on another neurotransmitter (transmitter of nerve messages) called glutamate. The drug shields the brain from glutamate which contributes to the death of brain cells in people with Alzheimer’s disease.
Effective in moderate to severe forms of Alzheimer’s disease, improving the day to day life of the person with Alzheimer’s disease, and by implication the life of the care givers. Improvements should be seen within a few weeks.
Alzheimer’s Medication information is from www.aboutAlzheimer’s.com
It’s been ten years since Irene’s original diagnosis of early onset Alzheimer’s disease. Irene doesn’t recognize her daughters anymore, but they check on her every day either by phone call or visit. She’s losing her ability to speak, which is sometimes just gibberish. She’s still mobile and is often restless and agitated. She walks aimlessly in the halls, common Alzheimer’s occurrence. Both sisters attend a caregiver’s support group to cope with their guilt, stress, and sorrow. They worry. Is early onset Alzheimer’s genetic? We’ll discuss this issue in a follow-up article.
Sidebar:
WARNING SIGNS OF ALZHEIMER'S
Memory loss
Difficulty performing familiar tasks
Problems with language
Disorientation to time and place
Poor or decreased judgment
Problems with abstract thinking
Misplacing things
Changes in mood or behavior
Changes in personality
Loss of initiative
*Irene is a fictitious name, but this story is based on a real family’s struggle with Alzheimer’s.
Saturday, July 7, 2007
Dream Interpretation for Self-Knowledge
By Jeremy Spiegel, MD
Dreams, said Carl Jung, are “letters we send to ourselves.” Properly interpreted, dreams are an invaluable tool for self-knowledge.
Scientists have proposed many reasons for why we dream. Sigmund Freud, over one hundred years ago, concluded that dreams display the dreamer’s deep unconscious wishes seeking fulfillment in the theater of the mind. Decades later Jung found that the meanings of dream elements exist on multiple levels, often linked to universal patterns, or archetypes. More recently, the late Francis Crick, co-discoverer of the DNA molecule, suggested that dreams help clear the brain of “obsolete data files,” making room for the storage of more current, practical information. All these scientists agreed that “downloading” the content of dreams and interpreting their often-mysterious symbolism is enlightening.
When interpreting a dream, first look at how it unfolds, noting its contents. You will likely discover some of the intrapsychic special effects Freud describes in Interpretation of Dreams, especially condensation, displacement, repetition, and wish fulfillment.
Condensation is a distillation of two or more beings or ideas from waking life into one image, frequently manifesting as a composite human being. For example, suppose you dream of someone who combines the qualities of a belligerent client you treated and your boyfriend of five years. In the dream, the client-boyfriend creeps up from behind you and bites your neck. You reach to touch the wound but feel nothing. Even so, your colleagues surround your assailant and force him into five-point restraints, whereupon he explodes with rage, unleashes a volley of expletives, and is dragged away kicking and screaming. Later, you learn he has died from a stroke. You experience horror, which rapidly gives way to a welcome feeling of liberation. Focusing on the condensation, you uncover the dream’s meaning: you must free yourself from your controlling boyfriend, whose emotional manipulation has had an injurious effect on you, preventing you from effectively caring for your clients and yourself.
Displacement occurs when dream content involves a feature or action unrelated to the dreamer’s waking focus or life circumstances. For example, say you dream about antique wallpaper even though in reality all your walls are painted. The wallpaper is peeling and impossible to patch. The more the wallpaper separates from the wall and the more you try to smooth it back on, the more holes are revealed in the surface behind it. Reflecting later, you realize the peeling ancient wallpaper represents your increasingly desperate attempts to cover up the “holes” in your life. Perhaps for many years you’ve been in denial about the need for a “repair” in your “home”—that is, in displacement-speak, a need for healing in your psyche and your life.
Repetition involves the reappearance of a dream element, either in the same dream or in recurring ones, and often in different formats, such as imagery, language, and wordplay. For example, suppose an empty bag of saline solution keeps showing up in your dreams. First you see it between the cushions of a love seat, then next to the milk carton in the refrigerator, and later dangling from the rearview mirror of your car—which, you notice, is running on empty. Upon later reflection, you suspect that the bag’s recurrence in your dream symbolizes the depletion of your resources and an unexpressed wish to quench your emotional dehydration. It also occurs to you there might be wordplay at work: the solution is to refuel yourself.
Wish fulfillment discloses a desire the dreamer may or not be aware of and provides the satisfaction of that desire in dreamtime. For example, say you are a local branch manager recently promoted to regional sales director. The first week on the job you dream you are overseas struggling with a foreign language and discouraged about your inability to communicate. Then you pull a red button from your pocket and press it. Feeling something “click” in your head, you suddenly unleash a stream of clear communication in the heretofore unfamiliar language. Your dream expresses—and satisfies—your desire to master your new job responsibilities.
If ignored or left uninterpreted, the dream elements of condensation, displacement, repetition, and wish fulfillment can leave you in psychic tumult, awash in disturbing sensations long after waking from your dream. Over time, unintegrated dreams can lead to self-defeating attitudes or actions.
By contrast, the more you practice dream interpretation, the greater your self-awareness and the better your ability to function mindful of, rather than ruled by, the hidden agendas of your unconscious. Interpreting your dreams can help you access and reinforce your true self. Ultimately, you can learn to dispel the tension and anxiety found in disturbing dreams and use the passion of exhilarating dreams to enhance your waking energy. You can decide which elements, themes, and resulting insights you want to hold on to in your waking life—which shells from your psychic sea you wish to keep.
Releasing Nightmares
Just as you can keep positive aspects from your dreams, so you can dispense with dream elements that undermine or frighten you. The “nightmare rehearsal technique” originated with patients “rehearsing” trauma-related dreams in front of a therapist, and gained popularity after British psychiatrist Isaac Marks used it in 1978 to successfully relieve a woman’s fourteen-year recurrent nightmare.
For example, suppose you have a recurring nightmare of your car careening out of control, smashing into another automobile and killing a mother and her two small children. To release this nightmare, revise it in your imagination. Go back in time to the moment when you began losing control of the car. See yourself regaining control and bringing your vehicle to a smooth stop. In your mind’s eye, watch as the mother and her two children serenely drive by your car, completely unharmed. Picture yourself driving on to your destination, safe, calm, and in complete control.
After revising the dream in your imagination, “rehearse” the revised dream sequence before bed. As a result, the nightmare will cease because the new, emotionally nourishing content reflects your conscious wish fulfillment, simultaneously decreasing your anxiety and enabling confidence to spring from your true self.
At-a-Glance Guidelines for Dream Interpretation
• Place pen and paper near bed.
• Write down your dream content.
• List the people, objects, and actions appearing in the dream.
• Note the intrapsychic special effects appearing in the dream.
• Free associate to your dream.
• Select the insights worth keeping.
• If your dream is a nightmare, revise it and rehearse the new rendition.
* * *
Jeremy Spiegel, MD, practices general adult psychiatry in Portland, Maine, where he lives with his wife and three children. A graduate of Princeton University and Dartmouth Medical School, Dr. Spiegel treats patients in his private practice, as well as in a mental health center where he works with the homeless and consults for the Maine Department of Human Services.
This article was excerpted and adapted from the forthcoming book, The Mindful Medical Student: A Psychiatrist’s Guide to Staying Who You Are While Becoming Who You Want to Be, by Jeremy Spiegel, MD. For more information, contact Elizabeth Wolf, Blessingway Authors’ Services, ewolf@blessingway.com.
Dreams, said Carl Jung, are “letters we send to ourselves.” Properly interpreted, dreams are an invaluable tool for self-knowledge.
Scientists have proposed many reasons for why we dream. Sigmund Freud, over one hundred years ago, concluded that dreams display the dreamer’s deep unconscious wishes seeking fulfillment in the theater of the mind. Decades later Jung found that the meanings of dream elements exist on multiple levels, often linked to universal patterns, or archetypes. More recently, the late Francis Crick, co-discoverer of the DNA molecule, suggested that dreams help clear the brain of “obsolete data files,” making room for the storage of more current, practical information. All these scientists agreed that “downloading” the content of dreams and interpreting their often-mysterious symbolism is enlightening.
When interpreting a dream, first look at how it unfolds, noting its contents. You will likely discover some of the intrapsychic special effects Freud describes in Interpretation of Dreams, especially condensation, displacement, repetition, and wish fulfillment.
Condensation is a distillation of two or more beings or ideas from waking life into one image, frequently manifesting as a composite human being. For example, suppose you dream of someone who combines the qualities of a belligerent client you treated and your boyfriend of five years. In the dream, the client-boyfriend creeps up from behind you and bites your neck. You reach to touch the wound but feel nothing. Even so, your colleagues surround your assailant and force him into five-point restraints, whereupon he explodes with rage, unleashes a volley of expletives, and is dragged away kicking and screaming. Later, you learn he has died from a stroke. You experience horror, which rapidly gives way to a welcome feeling of liberation. Focusing on the condensation, you uncover the dream’s meaning: you must free yourself from your controlling boyfriend, whose emotional manipulation has had an injurious effect on you, preventing you from effectively caring for your clients and yourself.
Displacement occurs when dream content involves a feature or action unrelated to the dreamer’s waking focus or life circumstances. For example, say you dream about antique wallpaper even though in reality all your walls are painted. The wallpaper is peeling and impossible to patch. The more the wallpaper separates from the wall and the more you try to smooth it back on, the more holes are revealed in the surface behind it. Reflecting later, you realize the peeling ancient wallpaper represents your increasingly desperate attempts to cover up the “holes” in your life. Perhaps for many years you’ve been in denial about the need for a “repair” in your “home”—that is, in displacement-speak, a need for healing in your psyche and your life.
Repetition involves the reappearance of a dream element, either in the same dream or in recurring ones, and often in different formats, such as imagery, language, and wordplay. For example, suppose an empty bag of saline solution keeps showing up in your dreams. First you see it between the cushions of a love seat, then next to the milk carton in the refrigerator, and later dangling from the rearview mirror of your car—which, you notice, is running on empty. Upon later reflection, you suspect that the bag’s recurrence in your dream symbolizes the depletion of your resources and an unexpressed wish to quench your emotional dehydration. It also occurs to you there might be wordplay at work: the solution is to refuel yourself.
Wish fulfillment discloses a desire the dreamer may or not be aware of and provides the satisfaction of that desire in dreamtime. For example, say you are a local branch manager recently promoted to regional sales director. The first week on the job you dream you are overseas struggling with a foreign language and discouraged about your inability to communicate. Then you pull a red button from your pocket and press it. Feeling something “click” in your head, you suddenly unleash a stream of clear communication in the heretofore unfamiliar language. Your dream expresses—and satisfies—your desire to master your new job responsibilities.
If ignored or left uninterpreted, the dream elements of condensation, displacement, repetition, and wish fulfillment can leave you in psychic tumult, awash in disturbing sensations long after waking from your dream. Over time, unintegrated dreams can lead to self-defeating attitudes or actions.
By contrast, the more you practice dream interpretation, the greater your self-awareness and the better your ability to function mindful of, rather than ruled by, the hidden agendas of your unconscious. Interpreting your dreams can help you access and reinforce your true self. Ultimately, you can learn to dispel the tension and anxiety found in disturbing dreams and use the passion of exhilarating dreams to enhance your waking energy. You can decide which elements, themes, and resulting insights you want to hold on to in your waking life—which shells from your psychic sea you wish to keep.
Releasing Nightmares
Just as you can keep positive aspects from your dreams, so you can dispense with dream elements that undermine or frighten you. The “nightmare rehearsal technique” originated with patients “rehearsing” trauma-related dreams in front of a therapist, and gained popularity after British psychiatrist Isaac Marks used it in 1978 to successfully relieve a woman’s fourteen-year recurrent nightmare.
For example, suppose you have a recurring nightmare of your car careening out of control, smashing into another automobile and killing a mother and her two small children. To release this nightmare, revise it in your imagination. Go back in time to the moment when you began losing control of the car. See yourself regaining control and bringing your vehicle to a smooth stop. In your mind’s eye, watch as the mother and her two children serenely drive by your car, completely unharmed. Picture yourself driving on to your destination, safe, calm, and in complete control.
After revising the dream in your imagination, “rehearse” the revised dream sequence before bed. As a result, the nightmare will cease because the new, emotionally nourishing content reflects your conscious wish fulfillment, simultaneously decreasing your anxiety and enabling confidence to spring from your true self.
At-a-Glance Guidelines for Dream Interpretation
• Place pen and paper near bed.
• Write down your dream content.
• List the people, objects, and actions appearing in the dream.
• Note the intrapsychic special effects appearing in the dream.
• Free associate to your dream.
• Select the insights worth keeping.
• If your dream is a nightmare, revise it and rehearse the new rendition.
* * *
Jeremy Spiegel, MD, practices general adult psychiatry in Portland, Maine, where he lives with his wife and three children. A graduate of Princeton University and Dartmouth Medical School, Dr. Spiegel treats patients in his private practice, as well as in a mental health center where he works with the homeless and consults for the Maine Department of Human Services.
This article was excerpted and adapted from the forthcoming book, The Mindful Medical Student: A Psychiatrist’s Guide to Staying Who You Are While Becoming Who You Want to Be, by Jeremy Spiegel, MD. For more information, contact Elizabeth Wolf, Blessingway Authors’ Services, ewolf@blessingway.com.
Thursday, July 5, 2007
Exercise or Play?
By Carol D. O'Dell
I spent a good deal of my childhood up a dogwood tree high above the earth imagining the wicked queens in their fortresses unable to penetrate my lofty perch. My cat Charlie and I would hide in the azalea bushes, his large disk eyes staring wildly at me. I had to hide him from the evil spies in the cars that cased my neighborhood seeking to kidnap the world’s most valuable cat and his diamond collar that held valuable secret codes.
I could swing high, higher, higher than all the other neighborhood kids. I’d swing so high the chains slackened their taut pull and wobbled indecisively, and then I’d push off and leap—suspend—and land two flat feet on soft sand. I did it! The highest I’d ever been! I’d try it again even though most attempts resulted in a mouthful of dirt, which I can still taste to this day. Apparently, my mother never looked out the window when I did this because if she did, she would have scolded me and then ordered Daddy to dismantle my swing-set.
That’s how I played as a child. What about you?
Now that I’m in my mid-forties, no one asks me to come out and play. But they should. Adult are preoccupied with stress, jobs, weight loss, bone loss, sleep loss, and we’ve forgotten the key. We follow the rules, or at least know the rules and warnings we’re not following. And a lot of numbers are rolling around in our heads: What your BMI score, your cholesterol score? Do you know your HDL and LDL levels? You better. Include omega fatty acids in your diet but avoid trans-fats. Don’t forget, thirty minutes a day of exercise that raises your heart rate and be sure to eat whole grains. Lots of whole grains.
No one will argue about the benefits of exercise. It’s a key component to weight management and can have a profound impact on many diseases such as cardio-vascular disease and diabetes. According to Fitness Today Magazine, there are six exercise goals:
• Muscular Size, Strength and Endurance
• Bone Strength
• Cardiovascular Efficiency
• Enhanced Flexibility
• Body Leanness
•
• Increased Resistance to Injury
But exercise can’t help us if we can’t stick to a routine. Ken Hutchins outlines the differences between exercise and play in his Super Slow Exercise Guide:
Exercise Recreation
Logical Instinctive
Universal Personal
General Specific
Physical Mental
Not Fun Fun
The differences are mostly mental. Many forms of exercise and play overlap. Attitude is everything. So how about listening to good ole’ mom? Go outside and play.
Play is a happy word. Play conjures up playgrounds, backyards, swing sets, swimming pools and baseball fields. Every child plays, or should. Every child plays differently. Some are naturally team sport player, others are runners, gymnasts, dancers, tree climbers, others love to roll down hills, build snow men, join swim teams, play with their pets, make mud pies. Every family has their own play history as well. Some families are hikers, touch football families or like mine, water gun families. We chase each other for hours, hide behind sheds and cars. Attack. Squirt. Run. Duck. Scream. We play for hours. We play after dark. We forget we’re hungry or tired. Or old.
Adults need to play. Ditch the exercise routine and dip back into those childhood memories and remember what kind of kid you were and how you liked to play.
What’s Your Play Style?
Were you an explorer? Then go for a hike. Team player? Take up karate or adult soccer. Loner? Join the Y and do laps or find your Zen state in tai-chi. Did you like to climb trees? Go rock climbing. The point is, you can still play, still be you, and you’ll find that by tapping into your play history you’ll stir up some great memories, rev your endorphins and never look at your watch in hopes that you’re workout’s almost over.
Why is play so much fun? Play engages a different side of our brain. The classic text The Handbook of Psychology by Jaan Valsiner and Kevin J. Connolly states that the most widely acceptable working definition of play is that it has “no apparent immediate purpose.” The text also states that play can resemble more serious behaviors and can include “exaggerated motions and vocalizations.” Anyone who’s ever watched or participated in a rousing game of beach volleyball can attest to there being plenty of “exaggerated motions and vocalizations.”
Many psychologists, behaviorists and anthropologists have noted that humans in all societies and throughout history play. Animals such as dogs, cats not only play, but they play with us in a wonderful exchange and can be both exhilarating and comforting well into our senior years. It’s also apparent that birds and marine mammals such as dolphins play. Scuba divers have observed that some species of fish also seem to play.
Play can be easy, challenging or engaging. Time and place begin to fade. We can play by ourselves, with our pets, with family and friends. Play can be hard, sweaty or dirty. Play can be quiet, loud, rowdy or easy. Play does more than merely release endorphins and give us a natural high. It’s good for our souls.
Me? I was and still am the bicycle queen. In my mind, I was an Air Force Pilot flying in an out of enemy lines. Zoom downhill on my bike--faster, faster, get my hips just right, lean, lean a little to the left, tilt, hold it, hold it, let one hand go, balance, let go of the other…no hands! Wind in my face, trees whiz by, wave to old lady Darcy, jump the creek, lean, lean, turn the curve. Do it again.
Carol has been published in numerous publications and is the author of Mothering Mother: A Daughter’s Humorous and Heartbreaking Memoir. She rides her bike in her neighborhood most mornings and let’s go of one hand.
Sources:
Fitness Today Magazine, June 2005.
The Handbook of Psychology by Jaan Valsiner and Kevin J. Connolly
http://www.relaxationexpert.co.uk/RecreationVSExercise.html
http://www.superslow.com/articles/exercise_vs_recreation.html
I spent a good deal of my childhood up a dogwood tree high above the earth imagining the wicked queens in their fortresses unable to penetrate my lofty perch. My cat Charlie and I would hide in the azalea bushes, his large disk eyes staring wildly at me. I had to hide him from the evil spies in the cars that cased my neighborhood seeking to kidnap the world’s most valuable cat and his diamond collar that held valuable secret codes.
I could swing high, higher, higher than all the other neighborhood kids. I’d swing so high the chains slackened their taut pull and wobbled indecisively, and then I’d push off and leap—suspend—and land two flat feet on soft sand. I did it! The highest I’d ever been! I’d try it again even though most attempts resulted in a mouthful of dirt, which I can still taste to this day. Apparently, my mother never looked out the window when I did this because if she did, she would have scolded me and then ordered Daddy to dismantle my swing-set.
That’s how I played as a child. What about you?
Now that I’m in my mid-forties, no one asks me to come out and play. But they should. Adult are preoccupied with stress, jobs, weight loss, bone loss, sleep loss, and we’ve forgotten the key. We follow the rules, or at least know the rules and warnings we’re not following. And a lot of numbers are rolling around in our heads: What your BMI score, your cholesterol score? Do you know your HDL and LDL levels? You better. Include omega fatty acids in your diet but avoid trans-fats. Don’t forget, thirty minutes a day of exercise that raises your heart rate and be sure to eat whole grains. Lots of whole grains.
No one will argue about the benefits of exercise. It’s a key component to weight management and can have a profound impact on many diseases such as cardio-vascular disease and diabetes. According to Fitness Today Magazine, there are six exercise goals:
• Muscular Size, Strength and Endurance
• Bone Strength
• Cardiovascular Efficiency
• Enhanced Flexibility
• Body Leanness
•
• Increased Resistance to Injury
But exercise can’t help us if we can’t stick to a routine. Ken Hutchins outlines the differences between exercise and play in his Super Slow Exercise Guide:
Exercise Recreation
Logical Instinctive
Universal Personal
General Specific
Physical Mental
Not Fun Fun
The differences are mostly mental. Many forms of exercise and play overlap. Attitude is everything. So how about listening to good ole’ mom? Go outside and play.
Play is a happy word. Play conjures up playgrounds, backyards, swing sets, swimming pools and baseball fields. Every child plays, or should. Every child plays differently. Some are naturally team sport player, others are runners, gymnasts, dancers, tree climbers, others love to roll down hills, build snow men, join swim teams, play with their pets, make mud pies. Every family has their own play history as well. Some families are hikers, touch football families or like mine, water gun families. We chase each other for hours, hide behind sheds and cars. Attack. Squirt. Run. Duck. Scream. We play for hours. We play after dark. We forget we’re hungry or tired. Or old.
Adults need to play. Ditch the exercise routine and dip back into those childhood memories and remember what kind of kid you were and how you liked to play.
What’s Your Play Style?
Were you an explorer? Then go for a hike. Team player? Take up karate or adult soccer. Loner? Join the Y and do laps or find your Zen state in tai-chi. Did you like to climb trees? Go rock climbing. The point is, you can still play, still be you, and you’ll find that by tapping into your play history you’ll stir up some great memories, rev your endorphins and never look at your watch in hopes that you’re workout’s almost over.
Why is play so much fun? Play engages a different side of our brain. The classic text The Handbook of Psychology by Jaan Valsiner and Kevin J. Connolly states that the most widely acceptable working definition of play is that it has “no apparent immediate purpose.” The text also states that play can resemble more serious behaviors and can include “exaggerated motions and vocalizations.” Anyone who’s ever watched or participated in a rousing game of beach volleyball can attest to there being plenty of “exaggerated motions and vocalizations.”
Many psychologists, behaviorists and anthropologists have noted that humans in all societies and throughout history play. Animals such as dogs, cats not only play, but they play with us in a wonderful exchange and can be both exhilarating and comforting well into our senior years. It’s also apparent that birds and marine mammals such as dolphins play. Scuba divers have observed that some species of fish also seem to play.
Play can be easy, challenging or engaging. Time and place begin to fade. We can play by ourselves, with our pets, with family and friends. Play can be hard, sweaty or dirty. Play can be quiet, loud, rowdy or easy. Play does more than merely release endorphins and give us a natural high. It’s good for our souls.
Me? I was and still am the bicycle queen. In my mind, I was an Air Force Pilot flying in an out of enemy lines. Zoom downhill on my bike--faster, faster, get my hips just right, lean, lean a little to the left, tilt, hold it, hold it, let one hand go, balance, let go of the other…no hands! Wind in my face, trees whiz by, wave to old lady Darcy, jump the creek, lean, lean, turn the curve. Do it again.
Carol has been published in numerous publications and is the author of Mothering Mother: A Daughter’s Humorous and Heartbreaking Memoir. She rides her bike in her neighborhood most mornings and let’s go of one hand.
Sources:
Fitness Today Magazine, June 2005.
The Handbook of Psychology by Jaan Valsiner and Kevin J. Connolly
http://www.relaxationexpert.co.uk/RecreationVSExercise.html
http://www.superslow.com/articles/exercise_vs_recreation.html
Tuesday, June 5, 2007
My Daddy’s Heart
By Carol D. O’Dell
The italicized portions of this article are excerpts from Mothering Mother by Carol D. O’Dell
“Carol, come to the hospital.”
I knew from Mama’s voice, the exhaustion, and the flat lack of hope, that Daddy had had another heart attack. This was his fourth: the one he had when I was thirteen, and two in the three years I had been married. It happened in the middle of the night. He grabbed Mama’s hand and clutched so tight she thought her bones would break.
I raced to the hospital, hoping and praying I would make it in time. Being newly married and having two young daughters had left me with little time to sit outside on warm summer nights and talk to him the way I had as a child. I wanted to make up for that lost time. I needed a good, long conversation about the stars, sitting next to Daddy, his legs crossed in the too-small lawn chair, both of us falling quiet, thinking.
Mama and I sat with Daddy in the drab hospital room day after day, waiting for the doctors to decide what to do. We knew we didn’t have much longer.
I turned towards Daddy, the mound of his body under the sheet and thin blanket, and I began to doze, dreaming about the times when I was a little girl and my Daddy would come home from work. I’d hide and giggle and wait for him to find me.
The year was 1985. I was 24 years old, newly married with two young daughters. My Daddy’s heart had worried Mama and me for more than ten years. It started with chest pains, and then I watched him gasp for air, stop every few feet and hold onto a chair, or a tree, or the door jamb. Wherever we were, he had to stop. Then came the nitro-glycerin tablets popped in his mouth like Tic Tacs. I worried. My own heart ached for him. He was the strongest, sweetest man in the world to me. But I also witnessed him continue to salt his food, make poor choices of fried and fatty foods, and do little, if any exercise. As much as I loved him and as much as he loved Mama and me, his actions didn’t show it. Habit was stronger than resolution.
“Where’s my little sweety-pie? I know she’s hiding. Could she be under the table? Behind the couch? In the closet?” He started the game even before he got his coat off.
I giggle, giving myself away, and in my dream I am four.
“Is she in the pantry? Is my little sweety-pie behind the door?”
I opened my eyes and looked at Mama. A loose strand of hair fell from her French twist, her teased front collapsing. I noticed the gray hairs in with the red ones, hanging in her eyes. She let them, too tired to care.
“I don’t know why the Lord allows us to be separated from each other in our old age. It seems cruel to spend a whole lifetime together only to be torn apart when we need each other the most. I don’t understand.” She got up and tucked the blanket under his chin, running her fingers through his hair.
“At least I have the assurance we’ll be together again.”
Heart disease continues to ravage our loved ones. We’ve made much medical advancement in 22 years and still, the statistics are staggering. Over 80 milllion Americans have one or more forms of cardiovascular disease (CVD). Eight million will suffer a myocardial infarction (acute heart attack). The good news is that the numbers are dropping due to education and an arsenal of preventative measures. Cholesterol blocking drugs are plentiful. The artery and valve replacement surgery my dad endured followed by many m
onths of recovery is now down to weeks. And yet, one thing remains: personal responsibility.
I drove home sometime after midnight and kissed my daughter’s soft toddler cheeks while they slept. My arms ached to scoop them up and rock them on that black, rainy night. I’d caught only snippets of them these past few weeks. I needed to do mommy things—take them to the park and feel my hand on their backs as I pushed them on the swing. I rubbed their chubby fingers until they stirred and left before I woke them.
I stripped down and crawled into bed beside my husband, Phillip. He held a pillow in his arms where I was supposed to be. I kissed his back and neck until he woke and turned over, whispering inaudible words as he drew me to him. We made love, silent, with our eyes closed. I drifted off to sleep, only to wake to the telephone.
“This is the nurse on sixth tower. Your father’s had another heart attack.”
Phillip drove me to the hospital, our girls asleep in their car seats, their heads drooped to one side. I pulled the visor down and looked at their cherub faces in the mirror.
They probably won’t even remember their Papa.
The world blurred. Every streetlamp, every lighted billboard zoomed by, and I noticed each one as if important.
I prayed for time.
Daddy sat on the side of the bed; his thin hospital gown did little good to cover this massive man. He glanced at me as I entered, then looked down to the floor. His hands, on his knees, braced his body.
The oxygen cord wrapped over Daddy’s ears and into his nostrils, irritating him. He adjusted it again and again. I couldn’t believe that after yet another massive heart attack he could still be sitting up.
Phillip stepped in front of me and held my mother in his arms. I knelt in front of Daddy, afraid to touch him and break the immense concentration he needed to control the pain.
“I want ya’ll… to promise me one thing,” he said with ragged breath. “I want you to promise… me… to be good… and… take care of… each other. Promise.”
Daddy passed away February 10, 1985.
This Father’s Day, make a promise to your family and to yourself. Take responsibility. Go for annual check-ups. Choose lean meats, veggies and fruits. Walk every night. Break a sweat. Go for the 94% fat-free popcorn, pretzels and frozen low-fat yogurt for treats. Start with the simple things. Do it first for yourself. And for those who adore you.
Take it from me--a daughter who misses her Daddy every single day.
Statistics are from http://www.americanheart.org.
The italicized portions of this article are excerpts from Mothering Mother by Carol D. O’Dell
“Carol, come to the hospital.”
I knew from Mama’s voice, the exhaustion, and the flat lack of hope, that Daddy had had another heart attack. This was his fourth: the one he had when I was thirteen, and two in the three years I had been married. It happened in the middle of the night. He grabbed Mama’s hand and clutched so tight she thought her bones would break.
I raced to the hospital, hoping and praying I would make it in time. Being newly married and having two young daughters had left me with little time to sit outside on warm summer nights and talk to him the way I had as a child. I wanted to make up for that lost time. I needed a good, long conversation about the stars, sitting next to Daddy, his legs crossed in the too-small lawn chair, both of us falling quiet, thinking.
Mama and I sat with Daddy in the drab hospital room day after day, waiting for the doctors to decide what to do. We knew we didn’t have much longer.
I turned towards Daddy, the mound of his body under the sheet and thin blanket, and I began to doze, dreaming about the times when I was a little girl and my Daddy would come home from work. I’d hide and giggle and wait for him to find me.
The year was 1985. I was 24 years old, newly married with two young daughters. My Daddy’s heart had worried Mama and me for more than ten years. It started with chest pains, and then I watched him gasp for air, stop every few feet and hold onto a chair, or a tree, or the door jamb. Wherever we were, he had to stop. Then came the nitro-glycerin tablets popped in his mouth like Tic Tacs. I worried. My own heart ached for him. He was the strongest, sweetest man in the world to me. But I also witnessed him continue to salt his food, make poor choices of fried and fatty foods, and do little, if any exercise. As much as I loved him and as much as he loved Mama and me, his actions didn’t show it. Habit was stronger than resolution.
“Where’s my little sweety-pie? I know she’s hiding. Could she be under the table? Behind the couch? In the closet?” He started the game even before he got his coat off.
I giggle, giving myself away, and in my dream I am four.
“Is she in the pantry? Is my little sweety-pie behind the door?”
I opened my eyes and looked at Mama. A loose strand of hair fell from her French twist, her teased front collapsing. I noticed the gray hairs in with the red ones, hanging in her eyes. She let them, too tired to care.
“I don’t know why the Lord allows us to be separated from each other in our old age. It seems cruel to spend a whole lifetime together only to be torn apart when we need each other the most. I don’t understand.” She got up and tucked the blanket under his chin, running her fingers through his hair.
“At least I have the assurance we’ll be together again.”
Heart disease continues to ravage our loved ones. We’ve made much medical advancement in 22 years and still, the statistics are staggering. Over 80 milllion Americans have one or more forms of cardiovascular disease (CVD). Eight million will suffer a myocardial infarction (acute heart attack). The good news is that the numbers are dropping due to education and an arsenal of preventative measures. Cholesterol blocking drugs are plentiful. The artery and valve replacement surgery my dad endured followed by many m
onths of recovery is now down to weeks. And yet, one thing remains: personal responsibility.
I drove home sometime after midnight and kissed my daughter’s soft toddler cheeks while they slept. My arms ached to scoop them up and rock them on that black, rainy night. I’d caught only snippets of them these past few weeks. I needed to do mommy things—take them to the park and feel my hand on their backs as I pushed them on the swing. I rubbed their chubby fingers until they stirred and left before I woke them.
I stripped down and crawled into bed beside my husband, Phillip. He held a pillow in his arms where I was supposed to be. I kissed his back and neck until he woke and turned over, whispering inaudible words as he drew me to him. We made love, silent, with our eyes closed. I drifted off to sleep, only to wake to the telephone.
“This is the nurse on sixth tower. Your father’s had another heart attack.”
Phillip drove me to the hospital, our girls asleep in their car seats, their heads drooped to one side. I pulled the visor down and looked at their cherub faces in the mirror.
They probably won’t even remember their Papa.
The world blurred. Every streetlamp, every lighted billboard zoomed by, and I noticed each one as if important.
I prayed for time.
Daddy sat on the side of the bed; his thin hospital gown did little good to cover this massive man. He glanced at me as I entered, then looked down to the floor. His hands, on his knees, braced his body.
The oxygen cord wrapped over Daddy’s ears and into his nostrils, irritating him. He adjusted it again and again. I couldn’t believe that after yet another massive heart attack he could still be sitting up.
Phillip stepped in front of me and held my mother in his arms. I knelt in front of Daddy, afraid to touch him and break the immense concentration he needed to control the pain.
“I want ya’ll… to promise me one thing,” he said with ragged breath. “I want you to promise… me… to be good… and… take care of… each other. Promise.”
Daddy passed away February 10, 1985.
This Father’s Day, make a promise to your family and to yourself. Take responsibility. Go for annual check-ups. Choose lean meats, veggies and fruits. Walk every night. Break a sweat. Go for the 94% fat-free popcorn, pretzels and frozen low-fat yogurt for treats. Start with the simple things. Do it first for yourself. And for those who adore you.
Take it from me--a daughter who misses her Daddy every single day.
Statistics are from http://www.americanheart.org.
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