By Belinda Hulin
Jacksonville travel writer Judith Martin isn’t planning to retire anytime soon. But between trips to research Barcelona architecture and Alabama barbecue, the 60-year-old divorcee has already started shopping retirement communities.
“It’s a way of making sure you can stay active,” says Martin. “Everybody starts slowing down eventually. If you live alone, there’s a lot of effort that goes into maintaining your existence. Living in a retirement community means you don’t have to worry about the cooking, shopping and housekeeping. You can reserve your energy for the things you want to do.”
Continuing care retirement communities—developments that offer everything from single family homes with minimal services to full-scale nursing care—are one of the hottest segments of the U.S. housing market. Generations-removed from your grandmother’s “old folks home,” these well-manicured campuses seduce active seniors with a siren’s promise of carefree living, resort-quality amenities and, when needed, easy access to medical services and daily assistance. As Martin notes, “It’s all the things you have at a great hotel--the pool, the tennis court, the dining room, the salon, the car service and the housekeeping—plus someone to help when your knees give out.”
A well-chosen retirement community can be an investment in ongoing mental health, as well as shelter. Today even mid-sized cities with a young demographic are likely to support several large retirement communities as well as smaller, more specialized senior complexes. Some may be affiliated with religious groups, while others cater to seniors with common interests. In the greater Philadelphia area, many retirement communities are affiliated with the Religious Society of Friends. Fleet Landing in Atlantic Beach, Florida attracts retired military personnel. There are retirement communities nestled into larger housing developments, so seniors can live near adult children or middle-aged friends, as well as retirement communities on college campuses, near artist colonies and near medical centers.
Such communities, as noted by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, have gained popularity because they provide a “continuum of care.” Able-bodied seniors make the decision to move to a house, condo or apartment in such a development while they’re still active, with the promise of being assured a spot in one of the onsite assisted living or nursing care units when and if that becomes necessary. A confluence of sociological and demographic trends has fueled the growth. First, there are Census Bureau estimates that the country’s elderly population will increase 65-percent by 2025. Combine that with the fact that people are living longer and—with adult children following their careers to far-flung places—are less likely to live near extended family.
“My children live in Canada, Colorado and Washington State,” says Winnie Young, an active 81-year-old resident of Vicar’s Landing in Ponte Vedra Beach, Florida. “If anything happens to me, my children don’t have to hop on a plane right away. That’s one of the things that I thought about before moving here. Also, when you’re living alone in a house, you think you’re going to be able to hire all sorts of people to take care of the things that need to be done, for both you and the house. Well, even if you can find people to reliably provide those services, the services keep getting more and more expensive.”
Young, a widow, gave up a house with a swimming pool in the exclusive Sawgrass community to move to Vicar’s Landing. Moving to a small apartment required “purging” her belongings to a manageable collection, but Young says she has no regrets. “I was tired of taking care of everything,” she says, adding that she loves the camaraderie of her community. “When you’re a single woman, it becomes more and more difficult to entertain and as a result, it becomes more difficult to socialize. Now, I can easily invite two couples to join me for a drink at our bar. And I’ve made the most wonderful friends here. I recently came back from visiting my brother in Michigan. A car picked me up at the airport, when I got here someone brought my bags to my apartment and I walked into the dining room. Well, it was as if I had this big extended family just waiting to greet me and find out about my trip. I absolutely love it.”
Of course, such convivial convenience comes at a price. Retirement communities have a wide range of payment structures, but most require an initial buy-in plus monthly fees. Some offer all-inclusive monthly payments, while others operate on a fee-for-service basis. Entrance fees can range from less than $10,000 to $500,000 depending on the age and health of prospective residents, as well as the size and style of housing they prefer, and the location and general amenities of the complex. Retirement communities that operate on a strictly fee-for-service basis offer some plans with no set monthly fees, however charges for home health care visits, dining room meals and housekeeping can add up. Average monthly fees for most retirement communities range from $1,000 to $4,000. Smaller digs in independent living units command a lower rate than more elaborate housing or accommodations in assisted living or nursing care buildings.
According to a recent Wall Street Journal article, residents in retirement communities generally have modest annual incomes from pensions or investments, but a net worth of more than $150,000. Residents generally sell their homes to fund retirement community entrance fees and to supplement investment accounts.
“Affording a retirement community can be tricky,” says Martin. “Most of us need our assets to generate income to live on in our old age. If you take a big chunk of that money to buy into a retirement community, that pretty much guarantees you’ll have less money to live on and do all the things you want to do.”
Both Martin and Young say people should give thought to moving to a retirement community while they’re still young enough to enjoy all the amenities and before they need all the life-care services. “I think people tend to wait too long to make these decisions,” says Martin. “They move after they’re disabled or need serious care, and they can’t take advantage of all the fun things these places offer. If you move to a retirement community because you’re forced to, that can be depressing. You want to enjoy your golden years, not feel like you’re waiting to die.”
[A version of this story originally appeared in Jacksonville Homebuyer Magazine.]
For more from this talented writer, click here.
Wednesday, May 2, 2007
Thursday, April 5, 2007
A Question of Attitude
By Sharon Moran
The issue of nursing in public is a source of constant debate. The resulting outcome of such debates demonstrates that many Americans are misinformed at best and at worst breast-phobic. Who could forget the Super Bowl display when Janet Jackson bared all, exposing her breast and part of her nipple? Despite the near hostility that is directed towards many nursing mothers, the reality is that the overwhelming majority of nursing mothers are conservative in their demeanor when nursing in public. In fact, nursing in public is so easy for veteran moms that in many cases people are usually not even aware if a mother is nursing or if the infant is simply sleeping.
It’s easy to see the impact that negative attitudes towards nursing in public have on breastfeeding rates. About 30% of new mothers in the U.S. never nurse their babies despite widespread evidence indicating breastfeeding as the preferred method of infant feeding. Of the 70% of new moms who choose to breastfeed, only 17% are still nursing at the 6-month mark, and a mere 8% reach the American Academy of Pediatrics recommendation of nursing for at least one year. The U.S. has the lowest breastfeeding initiation rate of all industrialized nations. In countries such as Sweden, over 90% of new moms breastfeed. One contributing factor to such a wide variation in breastfeeding rates across continents involves cultural attitudes. Many new moms in the U.S. never even attempt breastfeeding when their babies are born simply because of the perceived fear that they might one day have to nurse in public. The U.S. clearly needs a radical shift in the misguided priorities and gender biases inherent in the negative perception that nursing is abnormal or borderline obscene.
Certainly those individuals opposed to nursing in public offer what they believe are reasonable alternatives. The most common suggestion offered to breastfeeding moms is to feed a nursing baby in a nearby bathroom. Another popular suggestion is that a nursing mother should offer a nursing baby pumped breast milk in a bottle while in public places. There are at least a dozen reasons why feeding expressed breast milk is not viewed as a suitable choice by a committed breastfeeding mother, and for obvious reasons I won’t even touch the suggestion about “dining” in a restroom. One major issue with expressed breast milk is the possibility of contamination of the pumped milk, particularly on hot days. Also, even if a nursing mom fed a bottle of pumped breast milk, in the absence of actually nursing her infant, she will still need to pump at some point which really doesn’t solve the problem because when out in public she would be relegated to the bathroom to pump.
If the sight of a nursing mother is so uncomfortable to those who would love to ban breastfeeding in public places, I have to wonder what such individuals think of scantily-clad models on the magazine covers at the grocery checkout. Are these images as equally offensive and repelling? All too often in our nation another nursing mother is forced to a leave public place due to outdated attitudes that harm infants simply for the sake of ensuring that males will still be able to view breasts solely as sex objects. If men were biologically equipped to breastfeed (in some cultures males have actually nursed and generated a limited milk supply), I’m fairly confident that you would not see one bottle of infant formula in a public place. Breastfeeding would be viewed as the biologically preferred, health-affirming process that it is, rather than be viewed as overtly sexual and indecent. Men would have no qualms or hesitation about nursing in public. They would do it with the same nonchalance and ease they have when “readjusting.” Women, on the other hand, suffer from the “disease to please” which causes them to focus too heavily on what others think. Rather than be concerned for themselves or their babies, they are concerned with the outdated, borderline Puritanical attitudes of everyone else. I’m not advocating complete dissent from social etiquette guidelines. Rather, our social etiquette rules should give them same consideration and accommodation to breastfeeding moms as we do moms who bottle feed. Ban nursing in public places, and you have to ban bottle feeding as well.
On the countless occasions I nursed my child in public, I never once bared any visible skin whatsoever. I have easily revealed far more wearing expensive designer dresses than I ever did as a mother nursing in public.
As a teen, I was never offended at the site of a nursing mother, regardless of how rare it was to see a nursing mother. (To date, I have only seen about two dozen mothers nursing in public, all were modest, so I really have no idea what anti-breastfeeding citizens are complaining about.) I often wondered, at the naïve age of fifteen, why nursing mothers didn’t simply “plan better.” That was before motherhood, obviously, when I lacked the maturity to realize exactly what is involved with successfully nursing an infant. Infants nurse literally around the clock. Breast milk is digested very differently than infant formula, so a nursing infant often needs to nurse for an hour with perhaps as little as ten to twenty minutes in between feedings. Unless every new mom is expected to adhere to a sentence of house arrest, nursing in public is eventually unavoidable.
Admittedly, I did vow I would never nurse in public, and I made those statements as late as third trimester of pregnancy. Then reality set in when I became a mom, and I realized that nursing should not be viewed as such a negative, indecent event. I have absolutely zero responsibility for Hollywood’s success in sensationalizing breasts as sexual objects, and I don’t intend for the provincial attitudes that have resulted to unduly influence my parenting decisions. As a dedicated mother, I was undeterred from nursing in public and not about to let the misplaced logic of a small minority of reincarnated Puritans dictate what is best for my baby’s health and well being. It’s pretty obvious our nation is headed for serious trouble when Playboy and pornography are considered mainstream and the sight of a nursing infant is considered perverse. I have no issue with adult pornography or immodest attire, but if you’re going to dress in a revealing manner, don’t be offended by a mother nursing her infant or toddler.
I urge those who find nursing in public distasteful to undo their tightly-buttoned, overly-starched collars. Breastfeeding is normal. I realize a drastic shift in cultural attitudes will need to occur for nursing in public to become the societal norm, but my hope is that one day the mere sight of a nursing mother in public will be viewed as exactly what it is and has been for thousands of years-normal.
For more from this talented writer, click here.
The issue of nursing in public is a source of constant debate. The resulting outcome of such debates demonstrates that many Americans are misinformed at best and at worst breast-phobic. Who could forget the Super Bowl display when Janet Jackson bared all, exposing her breast and part of her nipple? Despite the near hostility that is directed towards many nursing mothers, the reality is that the overwhelming majority of nursing mothers are conservative in their demeanor when nursing in public. In fact, nursing in public is so easy for veteran moms that in many cases people are usually not even aware if a mother is nursing or if the infant is simply sleeping.
It’s easy to see the impact that negative attitudes towards nursing in public have on breastfeeding rates. About 30% of new mothers in the U.S. never nurse their babies despite widespread evidence indicating breastfeeding as the preferred method of infant feeding. Of the 70% of new moms who choose to breastfeed, only 17% are still nursing at the 6-month mark, and a mere 8% reach the American Academy of Pediatrics recommendation of nursing for at least one year. The U.S. has the lowest breastfeeding initiation rate of all industrialized nations. In countries such as Sweden, over 90% of new moms breastfeed. One contributing factor to such a wide variation in breastfeeding rates across continents involves cultural attitudes. Many new moms in the U.S. never even attempt breastfeeding when their babies are born simply because of the perceived fear that they might one day have to nurse in public. The U.S. clearly needs a radical shift in the misguided priorities and gender biases inherent in the negative perception that nursing is abnormal or borderline obscene.
Certainly those individuals opposed to nursing in public offer what they believe are reasonable alternatives. The most common suggestion offered to breastfeeding moms is to feed a nursing baby in a nearby bathroom. Another popular suggestion is that a nursing mother should offer a nursing baby pumped breast milk in a bottle while in public places. There are at least a dozen reasons why feeding expressed breast milk is not viewed as a suitable choice by a committed breastfeeding mother, and for obvious reasons I won’t even touch the suggestion about “dining” in a restroom. One major issue with expressed breast milk is the possibility of contamination of the pumped milk, particularly on hot days. Also, even if a nursing mom fed a bottle of pumped breast milk, in the absence of actually nursing her infant, she will still need to pump at some point which really doesn’t solve the problem because when out in public she would be relegated to the bathroom to pump.
If the sight of a nursing mother is so uncomfortable to those who would love to ban breastfeeding in public places, I have to wonder what such individuals think of scantily-clad models on the magazine covers at the grocery checkout. Are these images as equally offensive and repelling? All too often in our nation another nursing mother is forced to a leave public place due to outdated attitudes that harm infants simply for the sake of ensuring that males will still be able to view breasts solely as sex objects. If men were biologically equipped to breastfeed (in some cultures males have actually nursed and generated a limited milk supply), I’m fairly confident that you would not see one bottle of infant formula in a public place. Breastfeeding would be viewed as the biologically preferred, health-affirming process that it is, rather than be viewed as overtly sexual and indecent. Men would have no qualms or hesitation about nursing in public. They would do it with the same nonchalance and ease they have when “readjusting.” Women, on the other hand, suffer from the “disease to please” which causes them to focus too heavily on what others think. Rather than be concerned for themselves or their babies, they are concerned with the outdated, borderline Puritanical attitudes of everyone else. I’m not advocating complete dissent from social etiquette guidelines. Rather, our social etiquette rules should give them same consideration and accommodation to breastfeeding moms as we do moms who bottle feed. Ban nursing in public places, and you have to ban bottle feeding as well.
On the countless occasions I nursed my child in public, I never once bared any visible skin whatsoever. I have easily revealed far more wearing expensive designer dresses than I ever did as a mother nursing in public.
As a teen, I was never offended at the site of a nursing mother, regardless of how rare it was to see a nursing mother. (To date, I have only seen about two dozen mothers nursing in public, all were modest, so I really have no idea what anti-breastfeeding citizens are complaining about.) I often wondered, at the naïve age of fifteen, why nursing mothers didn’t simply “plan better.” That was before motherhood, obviously, when I lacked the maturity to realize exactly what is involved with successfully nursing an infant. Infants nurse literally around the clock. Breast milk is digested very differently than infant formula, so a nursing infant often needs to nurse for an hour with perhaps as little as ten to twenty minutes in between feedings. Unless every new mom is expected to adhere to a sentence of house arrest, nursing in public is eventually unavoidable.
Admittedly, I did vow I would never nurse in public, and I made those statements as late as third trimester of pregnancy. Then reality set in when I became a mom, and I realized that nursing should not be viewed as such a negative, indecent event. I have absolutely zero responsibility for Hollywood’s success in sensationalizing breasts as sexual objects, and I don’t intend for the provincial attitudes that have resulted to unduly influence my parenting decisions. As a dedicated mother, I was undeterred from nursing in public and not about to let the misplaced logic of a small minority of reincarnated Puritans dictate what is best for my baby’s health and well being. It’s pretty obvious our nation is headed for serious trouble when Playboy and pornography are considered mainstream and the sight of a nursing infant is considered perverse. I have no issue with adult pornography or immodest attire, but if you’re going to dress in a revealing manner, don’t be offended by a mother nursing her infant or toddler.
I urge those who find nursing in public distasteful to undo their tightly-buttoned, overly-starched collars. Breastfeeding is normal. I realize a drastic shift in cultural attitudes will need to occur for nursing in public to become the societal norm, but my hope is that one day the mere sight of a nursing mother in public will be viewed as exactly what it is and has been for thousands of years-normal.
For more from this talented writer, click here.
Thursday, March 22, 2007
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Tuesday, March 6, 2007
In Defense of Peaceful Sleep and a Free Economy
By Gerry Mandel
A concerto for cello composed in 1970 has brought the plight of our nation’s pharmaceutical companies to my attention. The situation demands bold and immediate action lest we as a populace be deprived of our meds. Recently I attended a performance by our city’s esteemed symphony. The centerpiece of the evening was “Tout un monde lointain” by Henri Dutilleux, a Frenchman who is obviously out to get us. The title translates as “A Whole Distant World,” and that’s what it was. The piece consisted of movements with names more appropriate to stores in a mall: “Enigma,” “Take Notice,” “Surges,” “Mirrors,” and “Hymn.” That should have alerted me to the difficulties that lay ahead.
As the cellist lurched his way from “Enigma” to “Take Notice,” I could no longer take notice and found my eyes sliding shut while visions of distant worlds clouded my mind.
Sleeping at a symphony can indicate bad breeding or advanced age, both of which I vehemently deny. So I began to flip through my program. Almost immediately I came upon a full-page ad that showed a woman asleep. Peacefully. She had a sleeping mask over her eyes. The headline read, “Ambien CR has 2 layers to help you fall asleep and stay asleep.” The last two words were in bright yellow.
To read the rest of this article in Hot Psychology Magazine, click here.
For more from this talented writer, click here.
A concerto for cello composed in 1970 has brought the plight of our nation’s pharmaceutical companies to my attention. The situation demands bold and immediate action lest we as a populace be deprived of our meds. Recently I attended a performance by our city’s esteemed symphony. The centerpiece of the evening was “Tout un monde lointain” by Henri Dutilleux, a Frenchman who is obviously out to get us. The title translates as “A Whole Distant World,” and that’s what it was. The piece consisted of movements with names more appropriate to stores in a mall: “Enigma,” “Take Notice,” “Surges,” “Mirrors,” and “Hymn.” That should have alerted me to the difficulties that lay ahead.
As the cellist lurched his way from “Enigma” to “Take Notice,” I could no longer take notice and found my eyes sliding shut while visions of distant worlds clouded my mind.
Sleeping at a symphony can indicate bad breeding or advanced age, both of which I vehemently deny. So I began to flip through my program. Almost immediately I came upon a full-page ad that showed a woman asleep. Peacefully. She had a sleeping mask over her eyes. The headline read, “Ambien CR has 2 layers to help you fall asleep and stay asleep.” The last two words were in bright yellow.
To read the rest of this article in Hot Psychology Magazine, click here.
For more from this talented writer, click here.
Monday, February 19, 2007
How Much Do I Say? The Caregiver’s Role in Health Care
By Carol D. O'Dell
Whether it’s the neurologist, cardiologist or podiatrist, my mother and I have had monthly bouts with some unsuspecting member of the medical community. Her Parkinson’s has progressed to the point to prohibit her driving, so I pick her up from her house, help her finish dressing, assist her to the car, and then from the car to the elevator, and finally on to the examination table. I am her daughter, her caregiver, her lifeline. But when the doctor comes through that door, I must hold back. It’s her doctor, her appointment, her body, and yet I am her voice, when she, and when they, choose to listen. (Excerpt from Mothering Mother)
To read the rest of this article in Hot Psychology Magazine, click here.
For more from this talented writer, click here.
Whether it’s the neurologist, cardiologist or podiatrist, my mother and I have had monthly bouts with some unsuspecting member of the medical community. Her Parkinson’s has progressed to the point to prohibit her driving, so I pick her up from her house, help her finish dressing, assist her to the car, and then from the car to the elevator, and finally on to the examination table. I am her daughter, her caregiver, her lifeline. But when the doctor comes through that door, I must hold back. It’s her doctor, her appointment, her body, and yet I am her voice, when she, and when they, choose to listen. (Excerpt from Mothering Mother)
That’s what it’s like to be a caregiver, to wonder what your boundaries are. How much do you say? How much authority do you have? You are the one who will be depended on in the end—by everyone. You will be the one to fill the prescriptions, dole out the meds, notice the tiny shifts in perceptions and abilities, and are ultimately responsible for another person’s care.
To read the rest of this article in Hot Psychology Magazine, click here.
For more from this talented writer, click here.
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